If you have a new baby, you’ve most likely been told to prepare yourself for what many people call the “dreaded 4-month sleep regression”. This is the point when people say all babies suddenly start struggling to sleep well – as if all the sleep skills they’ve been developing since they were born have gone backwards or “regressed”. As the name suggests, this so-called “regression” happens when a baby reaches 3 or 4 months old.

The truth though is that there’s actually no such thing as the “4-month sleep regression”, and the warnings well-meaning friends and strangers have given to new parents like you are both unwarranted and unhelpful. What you’re actually seeing happen is not a regression but a PROGRESSION. Your little one has reached the age when their internal sleep patterns naturally change to become more like the sleep patterns of an adult. There’s absolutely nothing backwards about it, and I promise you it’s not something to worry about.   

So what’s actually happening to make people refer to these changes with the made-up term “4-month sleep regression”?

Well, around 3 or 4 months of age, your baby’s sleep becomes more complex. Instead of consisting of just “light sleep” and “deep sleep”, each sleep cycle gets longer and consists of more stages – just like in an adult. Each time your baby moves from one stage of sleep to the next, there’s a chance for them to wake up – and more stages equals more chances of waking. On top of this, your 3 or 4-month-old is becoming more alert and aware of their surroundings, so they’re much more likely to notice what’s happening around them when they rouse.

If your baby has come to rely on certain sleep associations or sleep aids to fall asleep – like being fed, held, rocked or bounced – when they rouse or wake fully between sleep stages and cycles, they can find it incredibly tough to get back to sleep if those sleep associations and aids are no longer there. They might cry out 20 minutes in, 30 minutes in, 40 minutes in because they need your help to get back to sleep each time they rouse or wake. As well as leaving your little one exhausted, this pattern is stressful, frustrating and downright exhausting for you too, and it can feel like all of the progress you’ve made with sleep since their newborn days has come undone.

ALL healthy babies will experience these biological changes to their sleep pattern – but not all of them will experience huge disruptions to their sleep. Babies who are already in a great routine with all the healthy sleep foundations in place tend to manage this period of change more easily because they’re able to settle themselves back to sleep when they rouse or wake fully as they move through the different stages within the sleep cycle.

If you do find your baby starts struggling with sleep around this time, remind yourself that what you’re seeing is a progression, not a regression. This is such an important reframe because it will help keep you on track with what you’ve already learned from my educational resources and guidelines.

You might need to step in with a little extra support some nights, and that’s OK, but do your best to avoid introducing new habits and processes that will become a hindrance further down the track. Well-meaning people might advise you to do or introduce something that seems helpful when you’re exhausted and unsure when things will get better, but this could very well increase your little one’s sleep struggles long term, which will then become a problem for your whole family. When you need a little more informed, practical advice and support, my 4 Months Age Basics™ eBook is the perfect resource for guidance on how to navigate this stage.

The information in this BLOG ARTICLE relates to healthy babies and children with no undiagnosed, untreated medical issues or concerns. If you have any concerns about the health of the baby or child in your care, please see their GP or paediatrician.

For more sensible, straightforward, safe advice and resources on getting your family the sleep you all deserve, explore my website – sleepbysteph.com.au